Peyochips and the many worlds theory
March 15, 2084
So, funny story. I got stung by a peyochip. Okay, not ha-ha funny, but certainly bizarre. If you’re not familiar with this little critter, it looks very much like a platypus, but with a smaller beak and a more golden hue to its fur.
Fun fact about peyochips: just before the Flood Wars, the state of Louisiana in the old republic of USA was infested with the little critters. No one knew where they came from. At the time, biologists suspected they were an unknown variant of the Australian platypus that someone had kept as a pet and let loose in the wild. It was a pretty flimsy theory. This new variant took to the brackish waters of the bayou like a native, even though the platypus normally fishes in freshwater creeks. As I said, flimsy theory. But in those days, any suggestion of real magic could mean loss of respect by the scientific community.
The peyochips thrived in the bayous and soon pushed out other local fauna like otters and turtles. A hunt was proposed to cull the infestation, and a local man, Joachim Bledel, decided to profit from the whole business. He started raiding peyochip dens for eggs. He raised the puggles (Yes, that’s the term for a baby platypus. Have your moment to squeal at the cuteness.) and started a whole new pet industry.
In Mr. Bledel’s defense, peyochips are terribly cute. Their little rubbery beaks are almost like big noses. They have soft brown eyes and ridiculously pudgy feet. The name peyochip may be partly derived from the only sound it makes which is a sharp chip-chip, a bit like an angry red squirrel.
Bledel’s cottage industry never took off, however. Three years later, the first demon was spotted in Kentucky and the gates of the Flood Wars opened.
This is where my many worlds theory comes in. What if the peyochip wasn’t an unknown Terran variant of the platypus? What if the veils between worlds had been tearing for years or even decades before the wars? Not great gaping holes big enough to let in demons. Those came later. I’m talking about tiny tears. A little rip here, a microscopic hole there. Just enough to let through creatures from alternate dimensions. Most wouldn’t have survived in our world, and so we never learned of them. But in the infinite worlds theory, it stands to reason that at least one of those worlds would have a creature suited to our environment.
Maybe the peyochip came through the veil years before alchemists first detected any dimensional rifts.
That might explain how a peyochip ended up in a boreal forest outside of Montreal Ward. Poor little guy. Spring is coming, so he should make it through the next few months, but then what? Winters are hard this far north. I have a mind to go on a peyochip hunt and take him in before next fall.
Oh, and did I mention that peyochip males have a venomous spur on their back feet just like the platypus? While no deaths have ever been reported from platypus venom, I can attest to the unbearable pain of such a sting. It’s like nothing I have ever experienced. Even childbirth doesn’t come close.
Joachim Bledel removed the spurs from the baby males before delivering them to his customers. That sounds too much like declawing a cat for my comfort, and I would suggest leaving peyochips alone if you come across any.
Yes, I know. I should take my own advice. But I can’t rest knowing that poor critter won’t survive the winter, even if he did wallop me a good one with his little sack of venom.
I’m just wondering if there have been any other peyochip sightings in the north?
Comments (7)
I know it’s hard for you to resist helping a creature in distress. Please use caution (and maybe some thick leather gloves?) if you seek out the peyochip again.
cchedgewitch (March 15, 2084)
Thanks! I’ll be careful.
Valkyrie367 (March 15, 2084)
I migrated to Montreal from a ward down south. Peyochips are still thriving in the bayous. Not much likes to eat them. Too much fur and beak. They’re great for target practice though.
Colt45-4Ever (March 15, 2084)
The many worlds theory is as old as Socrates. Older even. But it has never been more relevant than today. I have studied what you call tears in the veil for many years. And yes, I believe the first tears predated the Flood Wars by decades, maybe even more. In fact, once you start reading our mythologies with an open mind, you can see evidence of these portals all through history. Where did Rip Van Winkle go? Where do the stories of dragons come from, and why don’t we find any of their fossilized remains? I could go on with hundreds of more examples, but to what purpose? The Flood Wars came. They changed everything. And to think that all the tears between worlds have been closed would be naive.
Dr-Salazar (March 15, 2084)
I’m fascinated by the many worlds theories. Do you think there are actually an infinite number of worlds, all variations of this one?
Valkyrie367 (March 15, 2084)
5000 years ago the philosopher Chrysippus suggested that the world died and was reborn for all eternity with many of those incarnations overlapping. Who’s to say he was wrong? I love to chat about all things multiverse. Perhaps we could meet for coffee one day, on a purely professional level, of course.
Dr-Salazar (March 16, 2084)
If you’ve got coffee, I’m game.
Valkyrie367 (March 16, 2084)